CDD Blog: Recent Comments

Comment on No! He's Not Getting Through

longingfor7 — Fri, 07 Nov 2008 17:24:52 GMT

So this is a wife who has had that sound spanking to make me do as told to, otherwise be submissive. Once you get a sound spanking you will appreciate it, also you will feel better about yourself as a wife and a mother. I pushed my husband to it. Everytime he asked me to do something, i did just the opposite. He kept saying that i would get a good one, but that never happened. He always backed out until one day i just kept on and on then he gave it to me alright. When he said i would get it good he wasn't joking i had him so angry with me that he couldn't help it. Once he started spanking me he felt good about it. Then he continued until he felt it was enough . I know it might seem strange but i pushed until it happened, an although my bottom was very sore after the fact, we are closer then we ever where before. Once he spanks your bottom like you deserve you will respect him and yourself much more. He will also respect himself more. After he makes your bottom sting for a while, you will think twice about defying him in the future. I'm not gonna lie my husband has no problem turning my bottom different colors. Also if he is to tired i will ask him if he will still give me the spanking i deserve and if he would like his belt. As to those who state that their husbands have never made them cry during a spanking, i however am always brought to tears. That is not a bad thing it is breaking your strong will and making you realize your husband is your rock. You should always encourage your husband that he is not abusing you, if you are welcome to getting your bottom spanked, it is not abuse. If more people where open to this there would be less divorce. But i do not feel a wife should be spanked just because the husband feels everything he says is right. Things should be dicussed in the start of it all. But defying your husband is a definate no, no. Would you appreciate if he disregarded you all the time?

Comment on Reflections on CDD from a Novice

Godsong — Sat, 25 Oct 2008 10:55:03 GMT

There seems to be a connection with humility and humiliation. I too, do not wish to be humiliated. My husband will say that he does not wish to humiliate me. Yet there is a little voice in my head that says I need humiliation to a certain extent, because I am so prideful.When he instructs me to do something similarly to what you described, I am resistant. I feel profoundly embarrassed.Certainly he has seen my naked form before, so why am I so resistant? I think it is pride. If anything, I suspect he needs to come up with even more ways to humble me,and not be controlled by my renegotiating his techniques and ideas.

Comment on No! He's Not Getting Through

Godsong — Fri, 24 Oct 2008 13:33:21 GMT

It was my intention to ignore this post, not put of lack of sympathy, but a lack of time. But my heart kept tugging at me, at your emotional investment and your time spent posting, searching for answers. So here I am!
There is a lot to address, so I will start with your questions list.
1.) I can't seem to believe he's really going to hold me accountable.
It will take him a while to regain his spine. After all, it has been surgically removed not only in our culture, but also with the sharp scalpel of your tongue. Even when he does not hold you accountable though, God does. I have had the Holy Spirit discipline me, even when my husband did not. Here's an example: You were disrespectful, but he did not notice. Confess to God and ask what is a reasonable punishment. One way is by denying yourself computer time. Instead of reading titillating descriptions of other woman's spanking, read your Bible, doing a word study on the meaning of meekness, or humility. Find a key verse and then write it out 100 times. You must grow in your submission and he must grow in his rightful place as your head. Keep taking it to God in prayer. Ask God to help your husband find his true male self, as He also helps you to find your true feminine.
2) I am nervous about actually working so hard to make it all happen.
Yeah, no kidding. That is called the flesh. The flesh likes to be comfortable and be undisturbed.
When you sow to the flesh though, you reap corruption. It stinks, it has no life, and it is dead. When you sow to the spirit you reap everlasting life. That is what is alive, lovely, pure and holy. It is worth the hard work.
3) I feel like I don't know what I am doing--I mean who in their right mind has 6 kids in 9 years!
Me
4) I know that I am going to have an insatiable desire to test him.

No duh!
That is true, but do you understand why it is true? You are a true daughter of your mother, Eve.
You've read and quoted Gen.3: 16, but have you really unpacked it?
Look:
Yet your desire will be for your husband,
and he will rule over you."(Gen.3: 16b NASB) Okay, cool.
But then look at Gen. 4:7:
"If you do well, will not your countenance be lifted up? And if you do not do well, sin is crouching at the door; and its desire is for you, but you must master it." (Gen.4: 7 NASB)
This is the same Hebrew word. Sin is crouching at the door, looking for an opportunity to dominate Cain. Sin does not love Cain and desire him romantically! Sin wants to control him. I am compelled to control and dominate my husband. If he lets me, I am miserable and always feeling disrespect and disdain fro him as less than a man incapable of leading and protecting me. But in order to take back control and help me, he has to rule over me. He has to have dominion, exercise control, and be alert, like any ruler in any territory. Then when he does, it feels right, I feel relaxed, and I can be at peace.
5) I want to do the right thing
You are in the Romans 7 dilemma(con't.)

Comment on Reflections on CDD from a Novice

back atcha — Fri, 24 Oct 2008 12:39:06 GMT

Nothing at all wrong with you. You might be dealing with some guilt issues, or just feel the need to be dominated by your man. Ask yourself: what could I get out of the spanking and then go from there. Good luck.

Comment on Our CDD Marriage

Renea — Thu, 23 Oct 2008 07:43:23 GMT

Hey there just thought I'd let you know that there is a new therapy in Switerland that is all about spankings to end a habit and it is proven to work better than dr.'s and medicine. unfortuantly its like 60 or so spankings a week for like 2 mos and everytime or close to everytime the offense is made!

Comment on Reflections on CDD from a Novice

carefreejoy — Fri, 17 Oct 2008 11:01:16 GMT

One thing that came to my mind that may help is if you and your husband really talk about what you want, what you don't want, how it makes you feel, what you like about cdd, what you don't like and maybe modify the way you do things- possibly you have already done this- i just thought it might help. Best wishes!

Comment on No! He's Not Getting Through

Anonymous — Thu, 16 Oct 2008 22:12:59 GMT

You must just have a very high pain level! I don't know what else to tell you. Perhaps he's spanking you too fast? He should let one spank sink in and then apply the other, let it sink in and then the other, etc....like two seconds apart I would say. ? I don't know!

Comment on Reflections on CDD from a Novice

Chessy — Mon, 13 Oct 2008 21:03:25 GMT

My thoughts on this reflect what more experienced CDD couples have said repeatedly, "CDD is not for everyone." Also, every couple has their own ways of living this choice. It sounds to me that your husband and you are going far beyond your comfort level. Is there any reason he can't lighten up on the severity? Maybe use his hand or a paddle instead? I truly believe in my heart that discipline/spanking is not a requirement for a God inspired marriage. A wife can read the Bible, take her "job description" to heart, and submit, obey and respect her husband. Likewise, a husband can take his duty to love and lead his wife to heart as well. Maybe the wife will need gentle reminders. However, I also believe that God expects a couple to live "as one" and if spanking helps a husband to keep his wife at his side, growing in love and respect, then it can be a helpful tool.

Comment on Reflections on CDD from a Novice

Chessy — Mon, 13 Oct 2008 20:43:11 GMT

So, did you cry?

Comment on Reflections on CDD from a Novice

Chessy — Mon, 13 Oct 2008 20:38:37 GMT

Chloe,
Well, thanks a lot for that detailed description of painful paddling. Not! (Just kidding Actually, I sent a comment to Noone on the Taken In Hand website under his Are You Getting Through To Her article about this issue. I will try to paste it into the CDD blog. Apparently, some woman don't cry, won't cry, can't cry. I just can't accept that I am one of them.

Last weekend, my husband marched me up to our bedroom saying that I was picking and moping.....just being generally bratty. I was actually out of sorts about a spiritual discipline issue that my husband and I had not resolved, and I did not know how to bring it up. My husband had made a paddle and he bent me over the bed and gave me 10 swats. I discovered a few things about myself during those moments. One is that when it hurts, I resist. I was taken by surprise when he decided to spank me that day. My husband tells me not to put my hands back there, but I was seriously not finding the strength to cooperate with that spanking. You are right that being over the knee does not hurt as much. Tears were coming very close. I was beginning to cry as he kept telling me to hold still while he spanked me, but then he stopped. Amazingly, as much as I fought that spanking, when he stopped so abruptly, I sort of felt uncomplete or let down in some way. It's very strange, but I think the crying has something to do with it. As much as I resisted, I tried telling myself to submit to it, but I wouldn't. I don't know how other women do it. It occurred to me that besides thinking only of the spanks and not repenting sorrowfully in my heart and mind, that I try to maintain the control during a spanking. So when I put my hand back there, or try to roll back over, or say, "Okay, that's enough, please stop....", my husband must listen to me. He must think it is too much for me to handle. Honestly, I don't know if it is or isn't because we don't know how to gage "too much" or "not enough" yet.

To further the confusion, I explained to my husband that I was acting out because I felt uptight about the promised discipline session which we were supposed to complete. It had to do with some spiritual revalations that I had during my prayer meditations. I felt strongly that God was telling me to write down my sins of the past few years and that my husband was to discipline me for them. Maybe I will write about it in more detail someday. It was supposed to be done over several days, but we had not taken time to do it. My husband decided that we could go ahead and deal with it right then and I basically received about 100 swats of varying intensity (some were pretty light) as I lied across the bed. I had hoped to have a breakthough experience of sorts as the reality of my past behaviors and the effects on my family sunk in, but believe it or not, I did not cry! I was relieved to have fulfilled my promise though. I do feel more convicted that obeying my husband is the right thing to do. As far as the crying goes, it's pretty scary...the thought of giving my husband pointers that he needs to hurt me more, especially since I haven't been very graceful about it as it is. Maybe others will have comments as well.
Chessy